Feeling Down

Sometimes you don’t realize how down you are until you start feeling better. I usually have an epiphany every spring. I start to realize how down I’ve been all winter long and how I just got used to feeling unmotivated until spring comes around and all of the sudden I have all this energy. Does anyone else feel this way? I know some people get down in the summertime, but I definitely get it in the winter. It might be a lack of vitamin D or it could be a mindset issue. Either way, it happens every year and I don’t usually feel it until it goes away. This year in particular has been worse because of multiple factors, and I just want to normalize feeling down.

I would like to begin by clarifying that sadness comes in different levels and I am in no way claiming to have depression or trying to diagnose anyone. Depression is serious and I would not claim to have it if I hadn’t been diagnosed. That being said we all know what it feels like to be sad and sometimes those feelings are very intense. For me I could tell that I was feeling more down than usual when I didn’t feel inspired to dress nicely or wear makeup. I usually love to pick out an outfit and put on some makeup in the morning. When I started to wear the same three outfits I knew that I was losing motivation. Part of why I took on this challenge was to try to regain control in my life. Life has felt so busy and I needed something that I could have control over.

This is my first year not being enrolled in school, and as much as it has been nice to work instead of go to school I have felt overwhelmed at times. I never imagined working on Sunday’s instead of being with my family, but that is how it is when you have a job. I also never took into consideration how little time I’d have off to enjoy Christmas. All of these little things that I didn’t think of have started catching up to me. I enjoy my jobs and I am happy that I decided to take time off of school to work, don’t get me wrong, I am just starting to actually grow up and it is intimidating.

So what can we do about feeling sad? The answer that we all want to hear is to just have a relaxing bubble bath and have a good sleep, which by the way can be helpful. In reality though, it is important to check in with yourself. Just acknowledging that you haven’t been feeling yourself can be very helpful. Often times when I am feeling sad it doesn’t help that I feel disconnected from myself. Being honest with yourself will do more for your mental health than you may think. Know that it is okay to not know why you are feeling this way and that healing is a journey. If you feel the need, talk to a counsellor or a trusted loved one. Just explaining your feelings can make a world of a difference. If you need a day off from work or school don’t ignore your mind’s request. You can’t always just have a day off whenever you’d like, but communicate with your employer/teachers and see if you can work something out. A quote that my sister told me when I was younger was “If you don’t ask the answer will always be no.”

I wanted to write about this because I feel like there are a lot of people who push down their feelings because they feel that it isn’t a big deal. You know yourself better than I do but I want to give you something to think about. Mental illness is very serious and can destroy people. I was diagnosed with anxiety when I was pretty young and have lived with it for a long time. I know people that have depression and it tears them down everyday. I don’t want to offend anyone who has any kind of mental illness when I say this but, if you do not have a diagnosed mental illness it doesn’t mean that your feelings aren’t valid. I have seen people try to open up about their emotions and have been shut down because they don’t have a diagnosed mental illness. Let’s be kind to everyone regardless of their mental state. I just wanted to say that in case someone has ever made you feel as though your problems weren’t valid.

Thank you so much for reading and supporting me. I know that tonight’s story was heavy. It is just so important to talk about it and acknowledge that everybody struggles with their emotions at times. It is okay to feel sad. I would also like to mention that although I am not a counsellor, anyone can reach out to me and I’d be happy to even just listen if that’s what you need! Thank you for reading.

-LG